Why can't we learn to get along, to be friends, to forgive and let go? We have become a very judgmental world filled with online cyber bullies. We're too quick to assume, too quick to judge others based on what someone else says, even without proof. We pounce on each other rather than take the time to learn the facts.
Don't you think that's sad? I know I do.
I'm saying this based on my observations of certain situations involving some of my author friends. Frankly, I'm really tired of it. Fed up!
A group of author friends have been harassed by a bully who slandered them online, and others jumped on the bandwagon to lend their voice to his false claims--even though they had zero facts. They trashed and bashed the authors, believing this malignant person, who shows not one shred of evidence to support his claims. He can't. Because he lied. But some people would rather believe an anonymous coward than a group of prominent, hard-working writers. Why?
One of my author friends was pounced on when something she said was misinterpreted, leading to a lot of bad feelings. Even when she apologized for it and tried to explain, people judged rather than accept the apology, forgive and move on. Where has compassion gone?
One of my author friends was duped into believing something wonderful, and she was so excited about it that she shared that info publicly, and she's being pounced on by others who are calling her a liar and other rotten names. They'd prefer to ASSume the worst. The people spreading rumors that the author lied are nothing more than bullies. Why not wait until you have ALL the facts?
Another group of author friends were conned by a very intelligent sociopath who has been scamming authors for a while. He provided publicist services, a common service in our industry. Others have judged these authors as being stupid, naive amateurs rather than understand how this conman was able to provide all the answers to questions plus endorsements that these authors then checked. These authors did their homework. Some have been in the industry for many years. They did their due diligence. But they were still conned. Believe me, this could happen to anyone, no matter how prepared you think you are. Ever buy ANYTHING online or by phone or in a store that came with a money-back return or guarantee? What if they refused to give you your money back?
Others were convinced to use an author "service" that guaranteed success and is now being considered unethical. It's not something I'd use because it involves a huge amount of money upfront and I personally don't find it ethical, but at one point many considered it okay. Many BIG name authors and even publishers used this service. What was acceptable a while ago might not be today. Do we judge those authors/publishers too and call them unethical?
On this Sunday evening, I urge you all to consider how you judge others. Because one day, YOU may be on the other side trying to defend yourself to people who'd rather judge you than believe you or even listen to the facts. To my friends who have been dealing with these issues, please remind yourself that as long as you stand in your truth, that's all that matters. Conmen, liars, cowards, bullies and blood-sucking vampires will come to light eventually. Until then, may Karma bring you lots of sparkly great opportunities. :-)
Update on Kerry Jacobson "publicist" scam (April 20, 2014): http://accrispin.blogspot.ca/2014/04/take-money-and-run-kerry-jacobson-book.html
4 comments:
Great post Cheryl. It really is horrible what's been happening to people. Judge not lest ye be judged!
I so agree, Susan, and thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. Whatever happened to "innocent until proven guilty"? And proof ISN'T someone talking about something. Show me the proof! I always like to examine both sides before making a decision on what to believe. And witch hunts never appeal to me.
Thank you so much Cheryl for reaching out to me - I'm saddened to know that this type of toxic behavior has reached epidemic proportions!
I know what it's like to be bullied, Andrea. Maybe I'm just different--I prefer to wait until I've seen proof before condemning a person in public. And in your case I've seen no proof of their accusations. Their issues seem to stem from far more than the USAT issue. I don't think they even realize who the real bullies are. Sad...
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