The Suspense is Killing Me...

I am patiently (ok, that's a lie!) waiting for 3 book reviews to add to the cover of The River...I hope...if all goes well and they actually LIKE The River....hehehehehe.... You have no idea how much this kills me! The wait...the agony of wondering..."Do they think it's amateurish...maybe it sux...maybe me and my editors forgot something {like how to write 'my editors and I')...maybe I left out something important...maybe it's too slow...not enough dialogue....not enough s*x....maybe it just plain sux...." oh crap...I hate the suspense. Somebody shoot me and put me out of my misery. Edmonton Journal headline: Mystery Novelist Shot to Death Before Releasing The River July 20th, 2005, Edmonton, Alberta - Canadian mystery author shot to death in her home while sitting at her computer. The last thing she typed was still on the monitor: "Maybe it sux!" The tall, thin thirty-something Alberta woman was found slumped in her chair after someone shot her in the head with an UZI machine gun. Investigators say she must have known her assailant as there were no signs of forced entry. "In fact," Sergeant Mor Bludsplattar says, "she would have died with a smile on her face...if there was a face still left." Shannon Will, a close personal friend and writer states, "Cheryl always wanted to appear in the Edmonton Journal. I guess now, her dream's come true." Funeral arrangements will be made sometime in June, as it's Tardif's favorite month. Donations can be made to the Canadian UZI Association in lieu of flowers. But if you have to bring flowers, bring white and blue roses, damnit, because they're her favorite! And a bottle of Jamaican Rum can be poured over the casket. Don't light a match though. Tardif's a non-smoker! On a lighter note, Tardif's blockbuster movie, Whale Song, hit the charts at #1 today... ok, ok...time to take my medication now... Cher